(Read Part II: The Preparation)(Read Part I: The Calling)
At some point between my vision quest calling and my preparation, I chose to follow my inner guidance and complete my vision quest without wearing contacts or corrective lenses - experiencing exclusively my natural vision. At this point, my journey became a true vision quest!
The night before my journey began, I went to sleep around 9pm. I set my alarm for 4:30 the next morning to be at the inipi site in time to start the fire before our sunrise inipi ceremony.
That night I dreamed that Dan and I both overslept and woke up at 7:14am (if anyone understands the significance of 7:14, please share it with me!). In my dream, we woke up, recognized that we both overslept, and went directly to the inipi site to light the fire. About 10 minutes after we lit the fire, Yellow Horse arrived to lead the inipi ceremony. He looked at the fire and said, "ah, folks - these stones don't look very hot." Dan and I shared that we lit the fire about 10 minutes before he arrived. At that point, the dream warped into another dream.
Interestingly, instead of feeling worried or stressed in my dream, I felt a sense of flexibility and peace. I felt an internal understanding that events unfold according to Divine Will, and that unexpected turns of events reveal opportunities for me to align my will more fully with Divine Will, while embracing a greater understanding of the unfolding events. In other words, the timing in my dream did not go according to my conscious plan, and everything still worked out well for me. As I surrendered in my dream and allowed myself to flow with the unexpected events that stemmed from sleeping later than I intended, the ceremony was still held, and all was well.
I actually woke up about 3 minutes before my alarm sounded. Dan and I arrived as planned at the inipi site. The fire started beautifully and we enjoyed a couple of hours of meditation, preparation, and honoring each other for our journeys. I agreed to carry stones from the fire to the inipi while Dan set stones inside the inipi.
I have been fire-keeping, carrying and setting stones for over a year now. It is an honor and a privilege that I enjoy and connect strongly with. I was especially grateful for my previous inipi experiences as I navigated around the inipi site in the pre-dawn darkness with my natural vision. I found myself connecting with my sense of touch and my inner feelings much more than usual.
When Cloud Dancer and Yellow Horse arrived, we cleansed our energy fields with sage, offered our individual prayers with tobacco to the fire, and began the inipi ceremony. Usually Yellow Horse leads the pre-inipi blessing. Today he asked us each to stand in one of the four directions. We verbally honored the direction we stood in, sharing our blessings with each other. I chose the west.
"I call upon the winds and wisdom of the West, to guide me into my shadows where I receive their gifts of wisdom. I call upon Panther to help me courageously navigate through and fully appreciate my darkness. I call upon Bear, the dreamer who walks between worlds and uses dream-time wisdom to navigate the waking world. My deepest shadows hold my greatest gifts. Aho."
We honored all seven directions, then Dan and the two elders entered the lodge. I carried ten Tonkas (stones) from the fire to the lodge, thanking each Grandfather for his wisdom and guidance. I always experience presence when I carry stones. This time I felt especially present, as I used more of my internal and external senses to help me 'see' clearly. I committed myself to the task, and I fully believed in my ability to carry fire-hot stones while seeing my surroundings in a new way. I felt alert, confident, and empowered. My feelings of courage and confidence grew stronger with each stone. I felt the Tonkas sharing their strength and faith with me.
Inside the lodge we held two rounds of inipi ceremony. We sang songs and shared our motivations for our journeys. I sang turtle song, reminding myself that wherever I go, I am at home and that I carry all I require with me. Dan sang forgiveness song, and I felt encouraged to engage forgiveness and compassion on my journey and in my life.
After the two rounds, we kept the fire burning. The altar and sacred space remained in place until Dan and I both returned to perform the final two rounds and close the ceremony.
My dear friend Krisanga volunteered to take me to my vision quest site. He was waiting for me after the second inipi round. I gathered my gear and we walked to his car. He shared with me that he had not slept much the night before because he was feeling ill. He would drive me to the beginning of the hike, and was unsure if he felt well enough to hike me in to my circle.
Faith and Trust, Krystalle! I am journeying on a hike where I have only been twice before, taking different entrance routes each time. I am water fasting, have no food with me, I haven't eaten since yesterday evening, and I am engaging my natural vision. Even my familiar surroundings look unfamiliar. Fortunately they still feel familiar! I quickly realize this as another opportunity for faith and trust. I recognize that just like in my dream, events may not unfold as planned or expected, and still unfold with grace and ease. I choose to make this easy and fun!
On our drive to the trailhead, I share with Krisanga that I feel comfortable navigating to my final destination once I reach the creek. I know I can find my way on my own if necessary, and while I am open to that, I still prefer his guidance to the creek. I ask him to simply be honest with me about how he feels when we arrive.
As we pull into our destination, he chooses to hike down to the creek with me. He shares that he is encouraged by my strength and courage. I share my gratitude with him for journeying with me, and for being an amazing friend and human being. We arrive safely at the creek after a beautiful hike through the rolling hills. Thank you Krisanga, for the assistance and the love, and for waiting patiently for me. I hike much slower while on my first day of a water fast!
After sharing hugs and gratitude with Krisanga, I continue my journey up the creek on my own. As I walk, I gratefully receive the peace and grace of nature. I feel life and love surrounding me. My surroundings look unfamiliar, and I feel beautifully comfortable. In the midst of admiring nature and reveling in its beauty, I come to a split in the creek.
Which way do I go? I recall others' advice about what to do when the creek divides: "Stay to the left," "Hug the mountain," and "Follow the water". I look ahead to find the water flowing to my right, and the mountain standing on my left. Hmmm.... I pause and stand still, feeling into each direction. Almost immediately I begin walking right, following the water.
After a while, I begin to notice that the terrain looks surprisingly unfamiliar. Did I make a sound choice? Am I going the right way? I stop again, and close my eyes. I check in with my Divine Guidance and immediately hear, "TRUST AND COMMIT".
Generally I receive guidance via images or feelings. This time I heard words that were so clear and vivid that I immediately chose to trust my guidance and commit to my journey.
After a short time I see a familiar large rock bed, then a familiar tree, and the turquoise canyon. Yay! I am in the place I desire to be! This means the waterfalls are just ahead of me. I climb this rock, move over this fallen tree, and .... Here is a waterfall.... I am not recalling this waterfall from my previous hikes here...It looks only vaguely familiar, and it certainly feels unfamiliar. Where is the large rock-face canyon that I climb? Is it beyond this waterfall? Have I somehow passed it without seeing it? This looks like a dead-end. Am I sure I am in the right place?
I turn around to retrace my steps, and ssshhh-BAM! My foot slips on a smooth rock surface and I fall into a sitting position. As I turn to stand up, I see THE TREE. No other tree looks like this sycamore tree that has somehow been hollowed out from behind! I AM where I desire to be! I TRUST and RE-COMMIT!
Ah - here is the path! It looks so different with my natural vision. This is where I cross over, then up this ledge, and ...another dead end?!? Impossible!
"IM Possible!", "I'M Possible!" "I AM Possible," guides my inner voice. And with that, I find my way to the falls. Here they are! Just in time to create my space before the sun sets and the light dims.
Before today I thought I might create my circle below the falls, yet upon reaching the lower sandy area where I intended to set up, my Divine Guidance encouraged me to continue hiking. My Vision Quest space is actually amidst the waterfalls. Amazing! Stunning! Beautiful! Thank You!
The ground here is rockier than I anticipated, and I am okay with that. I clear rocks to make a more comfortable sleeping area, and place them around the perimeter of my space.
Traditionally the vision quest space is a circle of stones with flags to mark the directions. I am surrounded in three directions by large, angular boulders. The stream runs directly in front of me, forming a natural perimeter. I choose to be flexible within the guidelines of tradition and create my space in the shape that organically fits this beautiful area. I ask for permission and assistance from nature and from Earth in creating my space.
With the stone perimeter in place, I post my direction flags at each gate: one at the north, east, south, and west gate, and three flags in the center of the circle for Earth, Great Spirit, and my Heart. Finally, I create a small fire circle and my altar. With the completion of my circle and altar, I feel surrounded in a sphere of nurturing protection. I feel safe and provided for; I feel at home.
My altar fits beautifully in the west gate - of course! I have been feeling a strong connection with the west since the concept of this journey formed within me. I notice the call of the west strengthening...
Stay Tuned for Part IV: The Bear in The Waterfall
